The Seed of an Epiphany

That was really irritating. Why did (s)he have to go and do that? I can go on and on. What that person just did(n’t) do has “made me mad.” It’s completely natural to feel that way. Everybody does it.

And I actually feel irritated; angry, even. And, why?

* * * * *

It seems to be a matter of expectations. I don’t remember when I learned to expect people to o what I wanted. They don’t teach a class in it in school. Unless you’re in sales, marketing, politics, law… I know, there’re a lot of them. But I haven’t gone through those courses. And I certainly cannot expect people to do what I want when I cannot or do not communicate it to them!

Yet, here I am, stopped behind this minivan (I drive a big, old pickup truck, of course) and I just figure they should know that I want them out of my way. Isn’t that obvious? So now I’m irritated, and my heart is pumping faster (I can feel it!) and my muscles take on that funny tension they get sometimes (the first one I notice is flexing my jaw)… we all know what it feels like…

And now I’m driving away from the scene of the crime, the nexus of circumstances, the primary cause for changing my entire outlook on the day… and I’m still irritated!

And now, an extraordinary thing happens. The seed of an epiphany. A miracle, albeit a small one.

I ask myself, “What are you angry about?”

“That just made me mad.” I answer.

“What just made you mad?”

“She just stopped. For no real reason. And then I had to stop. What did she have to stop for?”

“But the whole thing only took about three seconds; and you’re already out of there.”

“Yeah, but…”

And it dawns on me.